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2017年1月14日 星期六

[開悟卡] 關係牌組 需求


KEY CONCEPTS:

重要概念:

Dependence, as compensation for unmourned loss, with inability to receive

依賴,補償不被疼惜的損失,無法接受



Neediness is depending on someone else to save you.

需求-依賴別人來救你。

You see them as someone who will fulfil your needs, and therefore make you happy.

你認為他們會滿足你的需求,並讓你快樂。

Dependence is a core role we take on as compensation for a loss we have not recovered from.

依賴是為了補償損失的一種行為。

The more dependent we are, the more likely we are to use manipulation, particularly emotional blackmail, by feeling hurt, sad or carrying a long face to get someone to take care of us or to love us.

越是依賴,越可能操縱,尤其是情感勒索,帶著被傷害、悲傷或拉長臉找人來照顧我們或愛我們。

Neediness often makes us use emotions as weapons.

需求常讓我們用情感作為武器。

It's a path which cannot be successful, because the more dependent We are, the more of a burden we are to others, and the more unattractive we become.

這是不可能成功的路徑,因為依賴讓我們成為別人的負擔,我們越依賴,也越沒有吸引力。

Dependency is self-centered.

依賴是以自我為中心。

We see others in terms of how they can fill our needs.

我們看到其他人如何填補我們的需求。

Dependency attempts to take or get, but cannot receive.

依賴試圖拿取或得到,卻無法接收。

You may feel really good momentarily when your needs are met, but shattered when they are not.

你可能會覺得,被滿足的時間好短暫,破滅時什麼都沒有。

So, whether or not someone is fulfilling your needs becomes your test of their love for you.

所以,無論是否有人滿足你的需求,將成為你對自己愛的考驗。

Yet, the truth is we can be loved by someone who may not necessarily fulfill our needs.

事實是,我們不一定需要通過一個人來得到符合我們被愛的需求。

Using the card

使用該卡

If you receive this card today, you are being asked to take responsibility for your feelings and for your life.

如果你今天收到這張卡片,你被要求承擔你的感受與對自己的生活負責。

Know that when you are in this dependent position, you are setting yourself up for heartbreak.

要知道,當你決定依賴在這個位置上,你是在和自己心碎。

At some level, you are trying to capture another individual, which you cannot do if you truly love them.

在某種程度上,你想捕捉另一個人,但如果你真的愛他們,你不能這樣做。

If you are experiencing feelings, feel them through until they transform into positive ones, even exaggerating them to accelerate the process.

如果你正經歷這種感覺,讓它們通過,直至轉化為積極,甚至誇大加速這一進程。

For those who are willing to transform this situation, be aware that a key sign that you are acting in a dependent manner is when people seem to move away from you.

若你願意改變這種局面,必須意識到一個關鍵標誌,你的依賴行為讓人們從你身邊離開。

You can move through this quickly by letting go of these needs, using forgiveness, or the Leadership Principle: ‘If I’m suffering, there is someone else in even greater need of help. Who is that?’

您可以通過寬恕,或領袖力原則,快速放開這些需求:“如果我的痛苦,源自其他更需要幫助的人;那是誰?“

When the answer comes, step through your to support them.

當答案浮現,支持他們。

One whole layer of their - and your - will drop away, and you will once again be in the flow.

他們會和你剝去一層困難,你們將再次流動。

Love takes no prisoners.

愛中沒有囚犯。

It does not seek to enslave in order to give you a safe source to fulfill your needs.

它不尋求被奴役,只為了滿足一個安全需求。

Love gives freedom.

愛給予自由。

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